I am off tonight. Post from the road!
xx
Kat
Monday, September 15, 2008
Thoughts
I think of you in the morning because I wake up and wonder where you are.
I think of you on my way to work as I pass Caledonia Street.
I think of you at work as I check the loadings for my flights over.
I think of you on my break as I hope for you to call me.
I think of you after work as I drive past Caledonia Street.
I think of you at night when my friends are going out with their partners, when I see people holding hands.
I think of you as I go to sleep, wondering where you are.
I think of you on my way to work as I pass Caledonia Street.
I think of you at work as I check the loadings for my flights over.
I think of you on my break as I hope for you to call me.
I think of you after work as I drive past Caledonia Street.
I think of you at night when my friends are going out with their partners, when I see people holding hands.
I think of you as I go to sleep, wondering where you are.
Monday, September 08, 2008
Going the distance.
Being at the point where I'm about to wrap up 20 weeks of a long distance relationship (and then have 3 weeks together before another.. 20 weeks apart), I thought I would post some lessons learned and tips for others, just thoughts...
The long and short is, if they're worth it, it can be done. If you love them, it can be done. If you work at it and are realistic about how hard it'll be, it can be done.
The payoff, my friends, is so worth it.
- Even if it's just 5 minutes, make time for each other. Taking a few minutes at the beginning and end of each day to say I love you and I'm okay, or this is going on, makes a big difference to feeling involved in each others' lives.
- Oh the internet. I respect the internet medium, and use it all I can. Skype is a wonderful tool. Hearing his voice and seeing his face is a thousand times better for our communication than reading what he writes.. it is so easy to misunderstand text.
- Involving each other, even across the world. Asking their opinion, telling them what's bothering you.. like a real relationship, even.
- Honesty is awesome.
- Where were you last night? who were you with? and who is she? is she prettier than me?
- Try not to let your phone run out of credit in the middle of a text conversation. "Oh yeah. I'm out with this guy James. Man have I been drinking tonight! woo!"
- Trust goes a long way, obviously.
- Don't sweat the small stuff.
- Learn more, grow still. Don't put the relationship "on hold", as it were. Develop it as you would if they were here. Ask each other things.
- Watching a movie over Skype is fun, but pick a time of day where one of you isn't going to fall asleep.
- Have a date to look forward to. Knowing that you're not in an LDR forever makes a big difference.
The long and short is, if they're worth it, it can be done. If you love them, it can be done. If you work at it and are realistic about how hard it'll be, it can be done.
The payoff, my friends, is so worth it.
Little green girl
I am an alien.
An alien in my family, an alien in my group of friends, an alien even in my romantic relationships.
I may not be green with an oddly-shaped head, or fly in a spaceship, talk in beeps, write in symbols. I don't abduct humans, exsanguinate cows, leave crop circles. But I am outside.
Because I believe.
For my entire life, as long as I can remember, there has always been God. My parents are not religious people, and my siblings never seemed to be particularly interested, either. My primary school barely mentioned it, though it had Anglican undertones, and the occasional school church service. Intermediate school never said a word. I never went to church, other than youth group when we were kids during the holidays, to try and keep us out of trouble over the summers. We never prayed at home, unless it was grace before the Christmas day meal, and my grandparents were there.
But somehow, I believed in God. He was there. It was just a given.
Jesus was of course mentioned in the media, in school, in the world. I saw Jesus as a prophet, as someone spreading love and peace and treating our neighbours as ourselves. I wasn't really sure if he was the son of God, or what a messiah even meant. But God was true. I always knew God was true.
I spent my first three years of high school in Catholic school, and had mass after mass and religious education suddenly became part of daily life. I liked to question things, to decipher things, to ask the nuns why Mary wears blue. But it didn't fit.
I spent my last two years of high school in a public co-ed school, where religion took a backseat, and languages, music and boys suddenly came first. But I started reading books on spirituality, and God, and life taking its own paths, and Judaism. And then I went to America and everything changed.
Jews. Jews everywhere. Jewish kids I was teaching, Jewish friends in my bunk area, Jewish camp directors. Fiddler on the Roof. Hannukah. Yiddish. Talk of Shabbat and Purim and Yom Kippur. Kosher food in the dining hall.
What was this religion, these traditions, this way of being? A sense of community, a sense of family, an understanding between Jews, a respect for one another. Inside jokes, mitzvah, names like Goldstein and Rosenburg and Schwartz. And then me, this Kiwi girl with a Scottish name and red hair. Intrigued and feeling like I needed to step up.
I didn't know much. I still know so little. It is a lifetime of learning. I started to read. Judaism comes in many forms, with many different opinions. There is a saying - ask two Jews, get three views. In Reform Judaism in particular, you are free to explore and develop your own beliefs, and discussion is largely encouraged. Beliefs differ within one single congregation. But most importantly, it is liberal enough to respect the rights of its people, to respect women's bodies and their choices, and the human rights of homosexuals. To accept that there are Jews with different levels of observance, and different ideas on how to be a Jew.
My friends and family know little more about Judaism than Jewish jokes, Yiddish exclamations and ancient stereotypes about moneylenders and hooked noses. To me Judaism today is about family. A family gets together for dinner every Friday night, lights candles, says prayers, eats together. They share their week. They talk about their lives. They drop whatever they are doing to come together and talk Torah, to be together.
The holidays are about looking back at the past and forward to the future. Services are about embracing the community and making close connections, discussing beliefs and Torah, educating children on how to be better people, good adults. Life is about living the best life you can.
And then there is Shabbat. The day of rest. The more I read about this, the more I understand - taking a break from your busy life. Not just a day off work, but a day off of all the stresses or chores you need to do. A day where you go outside or talk with your family, see friends, do something you enjoy. It started to mean so much more to me, and despite being a shift worker who is at work every Saturday, I started to take one day a week as my Shabbat, as my rest.
I had also had a long history of distaste for pork (and often for beef), and had started to eat less and less. Reading about Kosher eating inspired me to give it a try, to try and embrace one aspect of a religion I couldn't really dive into yet. 4 years later and I'm still not eating pork, though I wouldn't say that I fit the Kosher rules just yet.
Baby steps. Baby steps. Reading. Talking. Online communities. Rabbis. Reading the Tanakh. I started to shape an idea of what I wanted my life to be - I wanted to be included in this, to have this history continue with me, to no longer just be spiritual or believe in God, but become a part of a rich history of people. And although this meant taking on a dark history and a lot of persecution, I felt a pull to be one of God's chosen people.
One of my dreams is to raise my children as Jewish. To instill in them the values that I see so much within the religion, and the sense of community and family that I feel when I think about being a Jew. I am not a Jew. I live as a Noachide, someone who observes the lifestyle and faith, but isn't formally a part of the club. I have not taken that final step yet, but after nearly 6 years of studying and reading and trying to live the best life I can, I think I am almost at the point where I'm ready to change from "I'm not Jewish, but I'm studying Judaism, I have a great interest in it" to "I'm Jewish. I chose to be."
But I am an alien. And despite it being one of the most important things in my life, and as mentioned above, in my faith, I cannot discuss things with my family. I am an outsider, someone who sees things through different eyes. I don't feel understood. I feel like I am from a different planet. I don't know how to find the words to talk about it with them. To explain that this really changes nothing for them. I will still be at my mother's on Christmas Day giving my nieces presents. I will still be just as private with them about my faith as I always have been. I will still be the same person, and they can ask anything they want.
But I felt, in those many months in America in 2003, that I had come home. That I had found my spiritual place, my faith, my religion. I felt like I had turned and stepped onto the right path for me.
And I truly feel that this is how it was supposed to be. I think I have always been Jewish. God just wanted me to find it myself.
Beam me up.
An alien in my family, an alien in my group of friends, an alien even in my romantic relationships.
I may not be green with an oddly-shaped head, or fly in a spaceship, talk in beeps, write in symbols. I don't abduct humans, exsanguinate cows, leave crop circles. But I am outside.
Because I believe.
For my entire life, as long as I can remember, there has always been God. My parents are not religious people, and my siblings never seemed to be particularly interested, either. My primary school barely mentioned it, though it had Anglican undertones, and the occasional school church service. Intermediate school never said a word. I never went to church, other than youth group when we were kids during the holidays, to try and keep us out of trouble over the summers. We never prayed at home, unless it was grace before the Christmas day meal, and my grandparents were there.
But somehow, I believed in God. He was there. It was just a given.
Jesus was of course mentioned in the media, in school, in the world. I saw Jesus as a prophet, as someone spreading love and peace and treating our neighbours as ourselves. I wasn't really sure if he was the son of God, or what a messiah even meant. But God was true. I always knew God was true.
I spent my first three years of high school in Catholic school, and had mass after mass and religious education suddenly became part of daily life. I liked to question things, to decipher things, to ask the nuns why Mary wears blue. But it didn't fit.
I spent my last two years of high school in a public co-ed school, where religion took a backseat, and languages, music and boys suddenly came first. But I started reading books on spirituality, and God, and life taking its own paths, and Judaism. And then I went to America and everything changed.
Jews. Jews everywhere. Jewish kids I was teaching, Jewish friends in my bunk area, Jewish camp directors. Fiddler on the Roof. Hannukah. Yiddish. Talk of Shabbat and Purim and Yom Kippur. Kosher food in the dining hall.
What was this religion, these traditions, this way of being? A sense of community, a sense of family, an understanding between Jews, a respect for one another. Inside jokes, mitzvah, names like Goldstein and Rosenburg and Schwartz. And then me, this Kiwi girl with a Scottish name and red hair. Intrigued and feeling like I needed to step up.
I didn't know much. I still know so little. It is a lifetime of learning. I started to read. Judaism comes in many forms, with many different opinions. There is a saying - ask two Jews, get three views. In Reform Judaism in particular, you are free to explore and develop your own beliefs, and discussion is largely encouraged. Beliefs differ within one single congregation. But most importantly, it is liberal enough to respect the rights of its people, to respect women's bodies and their choices, and the human rights of homosexuals. To accept that there are Jews with different levels of observance, and different ideas on how to be a Jew.
My friends and family know little more about Judaism than Jewish jokes, Yiddish exclamations and ancient stereotypes about moneylenders and hooked noses. To me Judaism today is about family. A family gets together for dinner every Friday night, lights candles, says prayers, eats together. They share their week. They talk about their lives. They drop whatever they are doing to come together and talk Torah, to be together.
The holidays are about looking back at the past and forward to the future. Services are about embracing the community and making close connections, discussing beliefs and Torah, educating children on how to be better people, good adults. Life is about living the best life you can.
And then there is Shabbat. The day of rest. The more I read about this, the more I understand - taking a break from your busy life. Not just a day off work, but a day off of all the stresses or chores you need to do. A day where you go outside or talk with your family, see friends, do something you enjoy. It started to mean so much more to me, and despite being a shift worker who is at work every Saturday, I started to take one day a week as my Shabbat, as my rest.
I had also had a long history of distaste for pork (and often for beef), and had started to eat less and less. Reading about Kosher eating inspired me to give it a try, to try and embrace one aspect of a religion I couldn't really dive into yet. 4 years later and I'm still not eating pork, though I wouldn't say that I fit the Kosher rules just yet.
Baby steps. Baby steps. Reading. Talking. Online communities. Rabbis. Reading the Tanakh. I started to shape an idea of what I wanted my life to be - I wanted to be included in this, to have this history continue with me, to no longer just be spiritual or believe in God, but become a part of a rich history of people. And although this meant taking on a dark history and a lot of persecution, I felt a pull to be one of God's chosen people.
One of my dreams is to raise my children as Jewish. To instill in them the values that I see so much within the religion, and the sense of community and family that I feel when I think about being a Jew. I am not a Jew. I live as a Noachide, someone who observes the lifestyle and faith, but isn't formally a part of the club. I have not taken that final step yet, but after nearly 6 years of studying and reading and trying to live the best life I can, I think I am almost at the point where I'm ready to change from "I'm not Jewish, but I'm studying Judaism, I have a great interest in it" to "I'm Jewish. I chose to be."
But I am an alien. And despite it being one of the most important things in my life, and as mentioned above, in my faith, I cannot discuss things with my family. I am an outsider, someone who sees things through different eyes. I don't feel understood. I feel like I am from a different planet. I don't know how to find the words to talk about it with them. To explain that this really changes nothing for them. I will still be at my mother's on Christmas Day giving my nieces presents. I will still be just as private with them about my faith as I always have been. I will still be the same person, and they can ask anything they want.
But I felt, in those many months in America in 2003, that I had come home. That I had found my spiritual place, my faith, my religion. I felt like I had turned and stepped onto the right path for me.
And I truly feel that this is how it was supposed to be. I think I have always been Jewish. God just wanted me to find it myself.
Beam me up.
Monday, September 01, 2008
Spring!
Yay September. The birds are chirping, it's not raining, the sun is out.. and soon the winds and crazy changes will follow, but for now we can buy into the excitement. Spring! hurrah.
2 weeks left until my UK expedition, and there is so much to be done. I'm organising myself an International Youth Travel Card, looking up the International Driving Permit, and making sure I have enough adaptors for the UK. Then there are assignments due, things to take over for family and friends, chores to be done, finances to be sorted, and well, packing at some point.
I am so excited. Abbey Road, Tower of London, the Tate Modern and such museums, Hyde Park, Piccadilly, Westminster Abbey, The Globe, Borough Markets, Oxford street... then there's Topshop, H&M, The Church, Harrod's, Selfridge's, dinner with family, time with Sarah, drinks with London friends..
And well of course, Scotland with Dave. Edinburgh, Stirling, Inverness, Roselyn Chapel, St. Mary's Close, Perth, and lazing with my lovely boy, and meeting his friends and family.
I don't have the biggest budget, but I will do it within my means and still have a great time, I am sure.
This is completely new territory for me. America I know. Australia I know. Japan I've seen bits of. The UK is a totally new adventure.
2 weeks left until my UK expedition, and there is so much to be done. I'm organising myself an International Youth Travel Card, looking up the International Driving Permit, and making sure I have enough adaptors for the UK. Then there are assignments due, things to take over for family and friends, chores to be done, finances to be sorted, and well, packing at some point.
I am so excited. Abbey Road, Tower of London, the Tate Modern and such museums, Hyde Park, Piccadilly, Westminster Abbey, The Globe, Borough Markets, Oxford street... then there's Topshop, H&M, The Church, Harrod's, Selfridge's, dinner with family, time with Sarah, drinks with London friends..
And well of course, Scotland with Dave. Edinburgh, Stirling, Inverness, Roselyn Chapel, St. Mary's Close, Perth, and lazing with my lovely boy, and meeting his friends and family.
I don't have the biggest budget, but I will do it within my means and still have a great time, I am sure.
This is completely new territory for me. America I know. Australia I know. Japan I've seen bits of. The UK is a totally new adventure.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)